Day 225: Turning a Sh** Gollum into a Unicorn

So, I'm still working on the MS. Polishing it, trying to make it sparkle. I've read and heard a lot of advise on revising and editing techniques and I think I've developed a process.

1. I read the MS out loud.
2. I remember that every sentence must do many things at one time. Each sentence should: read and sound perfect, further the story in the right way, and make the reader want to continue reading.
3. If at any point something sounds odd or just doesn't work, I highlight it in an unoffensive blue gray color.
4. If at any point I find a sentence that is particularly awesome and embodies my voice, I highlight it in a happy pale yellow.
5. If something strikes me and gives me an idea for later in the book (or books, in my case), I make a side note at that point or list it in another document.
6. After I've gone through a few pages in this manor, I go back and prod and poke and manipulate those places that needed fixing until they are perfect. And I mean PERFECT! No "Oh, that's fine," or "That'll do for now." No! I HAS to be PERFECT! *shakes fist at universe*
7. Once I'm done going from front to back, I will go from back to front, starting at the end of the MS.

And this is where my silly post title comes in. I love Kevin Smith and the whole ViewAskew universe. In his film, Dogma, there is a sh** gollum. It's the most disgusting thing ever. (I was going to put a picture of it here but it's just too gross) Of course, I don't look at my MS this way, I love my book (you hear that book, I love you, so give a girl a break, okay?). But, I plan on taking this thing that has practically turned into a monster and molding and manipulating and coaxing it into the beautiful thing I know it can be. A glorious unicorn, prancing through the valleys of representation and publishing!

Hey, what happened to that unicorn's corn?